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Burnett's Urban Etiquette

Friday, July 14, 2006

Friday Smackdown

Busy day, deadline day. So here's a few random thoughts:


  • For the last time, Anonymous, I was not bragging in my last post about compliment etiquette. You miss the point. The post was about how you respond when people compliment you for stuff you didn't "accomplish." I threw in the example of my wife, 'cause the little old lady complimenting her the other day made me think of this really inconsequential issue. Clearly you are not married, 'cause while I mean every word that I write, even if I didn't mean or believe my own words I'd still call my wife pretty 'cause she's my wife! I married her, which means even if she was three feet tall and 800 pounds I'd call her pretty. Get married and then come back and tell me that you don't feel your wife is attractive. And when you do that I'll be sure to let you sleep in my back yard while you're looking for a new place to live after your wife kicks you out. Anyway, again the point was the compliments. I've never been comfortable excepting them when they're aimed at me. It really weirds me out when I get other people's.
  • Val, good to hear from you. And you get points for the funniest response of the week. I think I will tell 'em my dog's hung over. That'll make for an interesting reaction.
  • The Miami Herald recently ran a story on breakups by phone/text-message, email, etc., which got my buddies and I talking. We all compared notes and all agreed that we've dumped at least once each over the phone. Shameful as it is to admit, I know I've broken up with at least one woman over the phone. But I was young and insensitive then. That's my excuse and I'm sticking w/it.
  • Question from a good friend: Say you meet a person of the opposite sex while they're visiting your town on a bit of vacation. You two hit it off and romance seems to be a strong possiblity. That person leaves town with hints and overtures. You trade flirty emails with that person. They drop more hints. Suddenly you find that there is a real possibility that the out-of-towner could be moving to your town. Coincidentally, that's when the out-of-towner's interest in you seems to cool off. What's going on? My answer was now that the out-of-towner might be moving to your town, they're backing off 'cause they don't want to start fresh with a significant other in tow. They want to keep their options open. Not nice of them, but I say true. I could be wrong. What say you?

6 Comments:

  • I got the point, I am very happily married and I also think my wife is the prettiest woman on the planet. It's a friggin' joke James, chill out. And I don't want to sleep in your backyard with the nasty neighbors' panties over the fence.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:16 PM  

  • OK, anonymous. Joke received. And really, you might enjoy my backyard. You could make a tent out of those panties.

    By Blogger James Burnett, at 1:15 PM  

  • I once dumped a guy over instant message. Trust me, he deserved it.
    (It was the Cold Dead Fish I've been blogging about recently).

    By Blogger Tere, at 2:47 PM  

  • Face-to-face breakup would be better if it didn't involve so much ado about nothing. As adults, I'd always hoped that you would get to a point in your adult life where someone's words and actions simply didn't hurt you so much, especially if you hadn't known them long. So if a relatively new flame decided to call it quits (esp. one with whom sex hasn't occurred), there shouldn't be that much heartbreak because neither has had put the amount of time into a relationship that makes it worth tears. Maybe that makes me Tere's Cold Fish, but we live in a very transient area. Someone moving here or moving away is as common as the sunrise. If you get that broken up about every person you just met, you're gonna be doing a lot of crying and moping about losing someone. Not cool, not attractive, not fun, and not worth the time for someone you barely know.
    Besides, just how much time and effort should you put into ending a relationship that's already over?

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 4:12 PM  

  • "Dumping Etiquette"

    Ok, so it goes something like this, no matter how transitory the relationship - "Treat other people as you would like them to treat you."

    So if you wouldn't mind being dumped by text, or not told, or whatever . . .
    Then don't go yelling when it happens to you!

    & compliments? Either it's an indirect compliment on your taste, or it's a comment on the wife/dog etc, & therefore not a compliment. End of potential embarrassment?

    Oh, while I'm here, I'd like to propose someone for the Gentleman of the Week award.

    I was coming home with my bicycle, struggling over the railway station footbridge, when a guy who'd come to meet someone asked if I'd like help. Would I? You bet! Thanks for asking.

    & the other proposal is for my husband, who has allowed (even paid for) me to attend far too many concerts at this year's Chichester Festival. Thanks!

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:22 PM  

  • Unless you are breaking up with someone who doesn't deserve the time of day, methinks not doing it face to face is cowardly.

    By Blogger Maria de los Angeles, at 1:43 PM  

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