Curse the insomnia!
I'd love to be asleep right now, but I made the mistake about an hour ago of paging through The Dilbert Principle. And in one of the panels - one in which Dilbert was wasting time while "working" at home - he asks this question: why don't monkeys grow beards?
I dozed off. But that stupid question haunts me. I can't get it out of my head, and I can't find a believable answer to it. But I know I won't sleep well tonight until I do.
So far all I've found is that monkeys do have beards but they're very light and thin 'cause monkeys don't shave, and that monkeys don't grow beards 'cause unlike humans they didn't evolve directly from water creatures. Thanks for nothing, Google.
I don't believe either explanation.
Stupid Google. Stupid monkey beards.