I need a new adjective for stuff I like
But in the spirit of Dave Chappelle, for the longest time, since even before he had his short-lived variety show, I have used "crack" to accent things I really, really like.
Drug use is not funny. Illegal drugs, drugs not prescribed by a doctor are not funny. The ravishes of the illegal drug trade are terrible. I know that. I think drug dealers should be strung up by their testicles with unbreakable fishing line.
Crack though? I'm sorry, but the word is funny to me. Seriously, I don't care if you're alone reading this right now or in a group. But just say the word aloud.
I dare you. Say "crack," and tell me that a few seconds later you're not at least smiling if not laughing outright. Sorry, but it just sounds funny.
I know this bugs my wife and has for the five years we've known each other probably. My mother thinks it's stupid too. But if, for example, I like a particular dish I will tell my wife "This is delicious - must have crack in it!"
Of course, I'm suggesting that the dish is so tasty that it is addictive.
They make clothes out of hemp? OK, that's cool if you're green. But my new pants, they're really cool. Must be made with crack.
My Starbucks coffee? Strong and tasty! Must have crack in it.
Family Guy? Hilarious show. Must be drawn with crack-tipped pens and taped with a crack-tinted camera lens.
I know. I know. Mrs. B will tell you it stopped being funny a long time ago.
And don't any of you uptight folks post messages and lecture me about the ravishes of drug use. I know drugs are bad. But we're starting to take this can't-say-this-or-that thing too far. Sometimes we just have to make light of the things that plague us just 'cause, just 'cause they're such monumental pains in the behind. Some stuff just sounds funny. Get over it. No one ever thought Jello pudding could be funny...until Bill Cosby started pitching it and using gibberish to describe how much he enjoyed it. Suddenly gelatin desserts were knee slappers.
What can I tell you? I have a twisted sense of humor. But the 1/10 of 1% of me that is sort of PC figures it's time I grew up and found a new adjective to describe my favorite things.
I'm open to suggestions.