TMI

How much are you willing to admit about your "flaws," in order to make money?

It's a rhetorical question, yes. But there's a point to it.

I remember watching an episode of Friends once, and I do mean once. It was the one with the black guy. I kid, I kid.

But seriously, I was watching Friends once, and one of the characters who played an actor on the show (Joey?) - how ironic that his character seemed to be struggling for work - landed an advertising gig that paid well. But the trade off was that he had pose as a guy who was happily living with herpes or some such goody bag ailment. So while he got a nice check out of the job, he suffered the awkward stares of hot women all over New York who happened to see his face on posters about coin purse warts.

I'm just not sure putting our flaws in the public eye is worth money. If I had micropenis - yes, it's a real disease - you couldn't pay me enough to talk about it. Same goes for those long-term issues that inspire Cialis and "blue diamond" TV commercials. And if I had goat-like BO? Forget about it.

What if you have yuck mouth, 'cause you don't brush? Would you really accept a check from a mouthwash company in exchange for admitting in a commercial that Cavity Creeps are traipsin' around your chompers? Sure you'd be paid, but saying "how about a kiss" afterwards would be futile.

Anyway, I'm rambling on about all of this 'cause a Miami Beach guy recently began promoting a new cream his company developed that eliminates bad smell on the old twig-n-berries.

Kidding? Heck no. This is for real. But it gets better. The company owner, one Dominic Adams, according to the company's Web site, uses himself as a marketing tool...no pun intended. He says he too has suffered from smelly junk, an ailment the site says can be a deal breaker with the ladies. Can't argue with that last part.

So I ask you, now that Adams has acknowledged that he has potentially stinky jewels, with whom will he share all the money he makes off this stuff? How will he get a date?

Who am I kidding? Adams is gonna make a mint on this stuff. And if I'm right about that, there will be women lined up around the block to meet him. And some of them won't even bother with nose clips.

But spoiled grapes? I admire Adams' self confidence. But this qualifes as Too Much Information, my friends, TMI.