Subscriber Services Weather

Burnett's Urban Etiquette

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Whateva, I can do what I want!

Sorry, I had to channel Eric Cartman for a minute.

Let's put it out there: You really can do whatever you want...But expect consequences, like, ironically, losing the ability to do whatever you want.

I was perusing the news earlier and saw this story about transgender prison inmates who want the govt. to spend tax dollars - $10,000 to $20,000 the article says - on sex change surgery.

But till now most state prison systems have resisted this push and insisted it's not an inmate's right to have a sex change operation. Nor, they've opined, is it necessary surgery. Some transgender advocates would disagree. Right now one inmate in Boston is awaiting a federal judge's decision on whether or not the state should pay for sex change surgery. Before you email me about sensitivity and what not, you should know this inmate murdered his wife 13 years ago and is serving life for it.

So it occurred to me that this is not at all about appropriate and fair medical treatment for a diagnosable condition. This isn't even about your right to change your sex.

I mean if I could make you guys by way of Uncle Sam pay for it I'd have a sex change operation into a guy who knows everything there is to know about sex.

Seriously, if you can find a way to work it out I say change yourself into a potted plant if you want. I don't care.

But this is really about screwing up badly and forfeiting privileges, rights, and opportunities as a result of your screw up.

If, for example, freedom in general was important to me I wouldn't jeopardize it by committing criminal behavior and landing myself a stay in a gated community. Or it would be fair to assume I really didn't care that much about my freedom.

I like butter pecan ice cream. If I get myself locked up though, I'm entitled to food, not necessarily dessert or specialty foods.

And so, if the right to have my sex changed is really important to me, I'm not going to kill someone and get myself sent to a place that is know for severely limiting your "former" rights.

What's the old gambling slogan, "You pays your money, you takes your chance?"

Who cares what your sexual status is? You throw away your life by murdering someone in cold blood, you should be happy you have a place to sleep and fresh air to breathe for the rest of your miserable life.


  • HAHAH! indeed sir, indeed!

    By Blogger roselle, at 9:34 AM  

  • I also like butter pecan ice cream. It is my favorite.

    I concur we do not need to spend tax money on gender reassignment, although I guess I would not mind providing someone with synthetic hormone replacement if it is cheap.

    By Anonymous Skoop, at 4:45 PM  

  • Why is it that those in prison for breaking laws seem to have more rights now that those who try hard to follow the law? It seems to me that if you murder your wife, in cold blood, you have no right whatsoever to expect taxpayers to fund your sex-change surgery. Or provide you with cable tv, computer rooms, workout areas (what happened to the prison yard).
    Is the only punishment now to be locked away from the general public? Between the granting of the wishes of people behind bars, where they reside by the ramifications of their lifestyle and the demands of rights by people who are basically breaking federal law by being here, I have decided that the only way to survive, i.e. competent medical care, food stamps, the advise of legal counsel, etc., that many who work cannot begin to pay for is to either take citizenship in another country and sneak across the border, or break the law and get sent to jail. As it is it costs more to keep someone in jail than a lot of people make in a year, maybe two, so let's deny the right to sex change operations at taxpayer expense and tell him that if and when he gets parole and a job he can get his operation then. Once again James Burnett you have nailed it. Thanks

    Laura (from the mountains)

    By Anonymous llh, at 5:27 PM  

  • This reminds me of Richard Speck--remember him?

    He was a rampage killer in the '60s who killed 8 nurses in one night (leaving one under the bed b'cuz he couldn't count.)

    The guy spent 30 years in the Chicago prison system only to grow hormonically-enhanced breasts and blow other inmates!

    A bad life? I don't think so!

    By Blogger Crashtest Comic, at 10:11 PM  

  • They let the inmates work in the prison kitchen and the prison laundry...Why not let them work in the prison clinic and perform the sex change operations on each other? Of course, you couldn't give them sharp objects, so they'd have to do the penisectomies with a plastic butterknife.

    By Blogger Mighty Dyckerson, at 11:51 PM  

  • Great post. And great comments.

    (And just hearing the name Richard Speck makes me want to throw up.)

    By Anonymous Freddie, at 8:43 AM  

  • Nicely written :)

    By Anonymous phil, at 5:08 PM  

  • I got one even better for you.

    I just got an e-mail (through MySpace) from the REAL DAVID BERKOWITZ.

    This is a guy who went around shooting people cuz the dog told him so, and now he's found Jesus and the Internet.

    My dog is telling me to choke homeless people, but who listens to their dog (except for Davey from Davey & Goliath.)

    By Blogger Crashtest Comic, at 9:02 PM  

  • I have worked in two penitentiaries, installing machinery. Greenhaven, in upstate new york, and another in Indiana. I ain't gonna go to no prison, if I can help it.

    By Anonymous og, at 11:09 PM  

  • CT, you are nuts! But I guess we all are a little bit. I told someone once my dog and I talked when I was a kid and told someone. Never make that mistake again. Tell people you're young Dr. Doolittle and they're ready to examine your brain and strap you to the probulator and what not.

    But what does this have to do with getting locked up and wanting special treatments after getting locked up?


    By Blogger James Burnett, at 9:51 AM  

  • Sounds like he's just looking for a way to get reassigned to a Woman's Prison. Can't imagine why ...

    By Blogger The Sarcasticynic, at 4:36 PM  

  • Ha! Nice try Sarc. Even I'm not so cynical that I believe some dude would willingly give up his twig and berries just to land in an all female gated community.

    By Blogger James Burnett, at 8:23 PM  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home