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Burnett's Urban Etiquette

Friday, May 04, 2007

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

PARIS HILTON IS SENTENCED TO 45 DAYS IN JAIL.


What did one inmate say to the other?
Who cares? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
But seriously, after the sentencing Kathy Hilton, the jailbird's mother, told the prosecutor he was pathetic.
Bad message, mom. He didn't pour the booze down your daughter's throat or force her to drive repeatedly on a suspended license. You should have hugged the prosecutor and thanked him for locking your rocket scientist up and thus maybe inadvertently helping her clean up her act.
OK, that's all the serious stuff I have to say.
Back to what I was saying earlier: ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

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22 Comments:

  • I wonder if the back of her jumpsuit will read: "that's hot"

    By Blogger Hammer, at 8:30 PM  

  • She said she only had (a)one drink, (b) may have been speeding while (c) on her way to get a hamburger. Which one is the lie? a,b, c, or d: all the above

    By Blogger My Reflecting Pool, at 8:45 PM  

  • Hmmmm, think they'll serve Carl's Jr. burgers in there??

    By Blogger Michael C, at 8:56 PM  

  • Dang! Hammer, "that's hot" would have been a perfect title for this post.

    My reflecting pool, she'll have six weeks to come up with better excuses.

    Michael C., she'll get served in there, but I don't think it'll be Carl's Jr.

    By Blogger James Burnett, at 9:00 PM  

  • I saw this and smiled inwardly.

    Ok, outwardly too. And maybe I giggled. Fine, and I danced with glee.

    Couldn't have happened to a better person.

    By Blogger Queen of Dysfunction, at 9:51 PM  

  • Amen!!! hahahahhaaha!!!

    By Blogger Claudia, at 12:31 AM  

  • A real judge and prosecutor in LA...

    and a mother who isn't one.

    By Blogger Pamela, at 12:40 AM  

  • Or did she call him 'pathetic' cos he only gave her heedless lil' girl 45 days?

    By Anonymous bronchitikat, at 7:16 AM  

  • "It's clear she was selectively prosecuted because of who she is".

    Ya know, sometimes I wonder if one reason celebs get special treatment is because the judge knows that to do otherwise means an extremely expensive and time consuming appeal by their attorneys. Rather than to subject the public to such expense, and the ensuing media circus, they merely "loft" the book at 'em.

    By Blogger The Sarcasticynic, at 7:45 AM  

  • Since we didn't have an Ask James Anything friday, maybe this would be a good time: Is there a black person that makes you embarrassed to be black the way Paris Hilton embarrasses me to be white?

    By Anonymous og, at 8:12 AM  

  • Queen, I wasn't quite up for a dance. I didn't want to break a sweat for her. But I feel ya.

    Claudia, here here!

    Pamela, I couldn't believe her mom. Not a classy reaction.

    BK, good to hear from you. Long time. But you make a good point. Maybe deep down inside, the mom was hoping she'd go away for the full three months.

    Sarc, I agree celebs appear to get an easier time of it in court. But I don't know if I agree with your reason. Maybe I'm too cynical, but I just think some of these prosecutors and judges are as awe struck as the average fan and doesn't want to "hurt" a famous person.

    Og, that's a very good question. My lighthearted answer would be the late Old Dirty Bastard. As my grandma would say, that dude was a hot mess. Today my lighthearted answer would be any number of gangsta rappers. But if I had a serious answer it would just be no. 'Cause I get enough old ladies clutching their purses on elevators around me - and I dress and speak well, I think - without having the added stigma of some other black guy's bad reputation.

    By Blogger James Burnett, at 9:55 AM  

  • I've got $5 on her skipping the country.

    By Blogger SWF41, at 1:52 PM  

  • It's gratifying to know that a sense of entitlement can only go so far.

    I think it's a miracle that she didn't kill any innocent people in her arrogant and reckless disregard for others.

    In that light, 45 days doesn't seem nearly long enough. But it does represent amazing progress.

    Her lovely mother should be serving time, too.

    Imagine all the deserving folks who could be helped with the money these trashy morons spend on frivolity, liquor and drugs to numb their sad lives.

    Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha YES!!!!

    By Blogger heartinsanfrancisco, at 2:49 PM  

  • SWF41, I swear I told Mrs. B the same thing last night. Seriously, this pantloadstress seems so freaked out about all this - based on what I read in West Coast media - that I could totally see her losing it and heading to Mexico or the other dirty Paris or something.

    HeartsinSanFran, I agree, her mom should get locked up for a few days for disrespecting the court. What arrogance to ask a judge or a prosecutor for their autograph. The question suggests she considered them small fries, 'cause they weren't famous.

    By Blogger James Burnett, at 5:34 PM  

  • Oh Lord, I can just see the lesbian-sex-in-prison video right now. She's gonna make a fortune.

    By Blogger Lee, at 6:07 PM  

  • OMG! She gonna suffer a consequence??? :-O

    It's about time.

    By Blogger katrice, at 6:29 PM  

  • I would like to think this could serve as a wake up call to young Paris, but unfortunately, it'll turn into a reality show, a book deal, and a guest stint on The View. Can we just ignore this person now, her 15 minutes are up!

    By Blogger Chris, at 10:24 PM  

  • Chris, I know you're right. She'll just get richer in the end. But the image of her and a cell mate who might whup her arse is hilarious still. We can take a tiny bit of comfort in this incarceration.

    By Blogger James Burnett, at 10:30 PM  

  • Oh how the hotties fall!

    By Blogger Manola Blablablanik, at 1:53 PM  

  • After months -- years -- of being tired of hearing about the shenanigans of various rich kids... at long last, some "GOOD" news.

    By Blogger thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy, at 10:45 AM  

  • [Though, yes, I'm sure she'll find some way to make her already-privileged bank accounts further swell].

    By Blogger thirdworstpoetinthegalaxy, at 10:46 AM  

  • I am soooooo happy parasite is going away and her money can't get her out of it. *sings praise to prosecutor*

    By Blogger Christina_the_wench, at 2:08 PM  

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